Shhhh... It's a Surprise!

Kameron's birthday isn't for another month, but with Thanksgiving and Christmas coming we decided to celebrate early. Kameron's good friend Chloe and I planned a surprise party and she pretty much freaked out! She had a lot of fun! My oldest baby girl is going to turn 12. weird.

Upcoming Events

I got my tickets to see this...


I got my tickets to see this...


Now, just for fun, watch this...

Preston is 3!

Happy birthday to my Preston! He has been waiting for weeks for this day and he was so excited it was his day! He loved opening his presents and was thrilled to get his spider man bike... it's all he has been talking about and all he really wanted!

Birthday kisses!



Preston is such a good boy! He recently got a new bed. A full size twin bed and he is so proud and happy about it. He also just started preschool and he LOVES it!
He is getting so big and tall, but he still says adorable things that melt my heart. One way he tells me that he loves me is by repeating to me, what I have said to him since he was born..."you're my baby boy. You're my son" It is really sweet.

The cutest baby Preston in the world!

Preston, I love you so much! You are my baby boy! You are my son, forever! I am so thankful that you are my boy and that I am your mom! You make me laugh and you are such a big helper to me. I love it when you read Mylie a book and when you share your toys with Lakin. I love your smile. You are such a good and sweet boy! i love you!

A New Baby

A couple of weeks ago, we were chosen by a beautiful birthmom to be the parents of her soon-to-be baby girl. We couldn't be more thrilled! She is scheduled to have a c-section on Nov. 30th. I am so thankful for this little girl. I really wanted one more daughter and I am thankful beyond words that our new birthmom picked us!

I have been busy and trying to get everything ready. If you remember, a few posts back, when we thought for sure that we were going to adopt the sibling group and then our family would be complete, I got rid of all my baby stuff!

Well, it's been fun to get new stuff and I have been "nesting" and cleaning like crazy.

Pete and I were talking the other night about our new daughter. He told me he was really excited. There is just something so wonderful about having a brand new baby in the house. Every one's voices get quieter. Life seems to slow down. I love to watch my kids watch and look at their new sibling and adore their little features. I love so many things about babies. They smell like heaven. They are so new and small and clean. Their 20 inch little body is adorable when you lay them on your shoulder and their little tiny bum sticks up on your chest. I wonder what she will look like? I can't wait to meet her.

This year has been a wild year. For 6+ months this year I put total focus on older child adoption. I read everything I could. I talked to people and tried to learn from their experience. I thought up my own ideas related to bonding and attachment. I was really ready. I got the new kids rooms all ready. Pete and I prayed about this decision. Together and apart. We felt it was right. I was really sure that they were my kids, and I was ready to go for it. To be 100% committed to them as their mother despite the fact that it was going to be VERY hard for YEARS and we would be dealing with things that are very hard to deal with. We were still going to do it even though everyone thought we were crazy and we thought we were crazy too.

Then, as clear as can be, and as inconvenient as can be, and as devastatingly as can be, Pete knew it wasn't right. There was no logical reason why. Pete is such a logical thinker, and I think as humans having reasons help comfort us. I have learned a lot this year. A lot about faith and trust. I know without a doubt that things happen for a reason. Sometimes we get to know why. Sometimes we don't and maybe never will. We can be angry. We can make guesses to help us feel better, there are lots of different reactions we can choose, but ultimately we have to just let it all go and know that Heavenly Father does indeed love all of His children and He has a plan for each one of us. A big part of it is the growing and learning through experience. The soul stretching that in some cases, is just raw hurt. I believe that sometimes we are even given certain trials for our own personal tutoring.

I am thankful for all that I have learned through my recent experiences. I can't wait to hold my new baby girl and feel her warm tiny body against mine and again feel the humility, gratitude, and weight that comes with being given such a wonderful and precious gift. I don't take my responsibilities lightly. Where much is given, much is required.

I am so thankful.

Having Twins

I have loved having twins. Having 2 babies at once taught me a lot. Having 2 boys the same age will continue to teach me a lot. Caden and Carsen couldn't be more different, yet they love each other so much and play so well together.

The other day I saw this at preschool...

Naturally, I looked for my boys and saw Caden's first. It is so him. He is logical and helpful. To the point, and very knowledgeable.

Then I found Carsen's. I laughed out loud! Carsen is always making me laugh and his "turkey recipe" was so him. He has a big imagination and "thinks outside the box." He's full of emotion and doesn't mean to be, but he's funny.

Bones, teeth, and feathers? sick! Go to the forest and just randomly find a turkey? ha ha!

The boys preschool teacher tells me that they save seats for each other and look out for one another, but also reach out to the other kids and play with them too. Together and alone. My twins make me happy and are so cute. What a gift they are to each other and will be through out their whole life!

Happy Birthday Mylie!

My baby girl is a 2 year old!
From this...

To this...

She had a really fun weekend! We all did! Mylie's birthmom flew all the way from the east coast to be here for her birthday!
Do they look alike?

We went to the Bean Museum and saw all the animals. (I love this pic)



Then we went on a little hike.


Then we had Mylie's birthday party!! We played games.



We ate cake and Ice cream.


Opened presents and...

went to Boardwalk to get some yummy ice cream!

Mylie's birthmom, Bgreat grandma, and Bgrandma got her so many cute clothes!

Thanks for coming T. We love you!

Mylie, I am thankful everyday to have you as a daughter. You are a beautiful girl and have been blessed with so many gifts. You have a strong spirit that I know will serve you well in your life. You love life and like to laugh and have fun. Your smile, when you share it, lights up the whole room! I love you so much Mayabear! More than you'll ever know.

I took a few pics of the pretty colors around my yard a while back. I'm glad I did because now all those leaves are on the ground. I love the fall. It's my favorite time of year. I love November. It's National Adoption Month. Adoption is so special and important to me. Two of my babies were born in November. Soon to be three. Thanksgiving is in November. I don't like to cook, or cook all day, inhale the food, and then clean up, but I love the thought of thinking about all of my blessings. It makes me happy. It makes all the things I am working on, and struggle with, disappear and my mind is consumed with gratitude. Oh! I am so thankful. It's going to be a great month.

Burning Bush

Purple Ash tree

The Jazz

We took the 5 oldest to the Jazz vs Clippers game the other night. It was a lot of fun!

Here's some pics of Pete trying to make the game seem a little more exciting than it really was.


My favorite player is this guy... Deron Williams

During some parts of the game, they would throw out balls to the crowd and I caught one, and my boys thought I was awesome! Look at Carsen's face! Fun night.

Halloween 2009

Carving pumpkins







Here is a pic of Caden's sick dorky vampire teeth. Luckily he didn't wear these and he got a new pair of normal vampire teeth that even glow in the dark!

It's Friday

I love Fridays...my favorite day of the week! I got all the kids off to school wearing their Halloween gear. Skyler decided to go as "himself". I quickly told him that "in our family if you want to go trick or treating you have to dress up, so you better think up a costume quick". I wonder what he'll decide to be tomorrow.

The kids have been all excited about Halloween. Preston has wanted to wear his Obi Won outfit all day, for days.

Carsen is the cutest Ninja you have ever seen. Especially when he does his moves. He is by far my funniest child and he doesn't even mean to be funny, but he just is. I call him my biological baby and he is just so much fun. The other day when I picked the boys up from pre school he said... "Mom, I'm like the coolest boy in my preschool". I asked him why he thought that and in a convincing voice with so much drama, he said "C'mon mom! these are like the coolest pants! I love to wear these pants... they make me the coolest boy in pre school." wow! I had no idea he loved his jeans so much!

Caden is a vampire this year and Pete had the job to take him and buy some child size fangs. Well, they could only find "one size fits all" so although Caden is proud of his fang teeth and thinks they are cool, he is kind of a dorky vampire. I will post pics tomorrow. And you will see.

I rearranged Mylie's room and she is officially sleeping in a toddler bed now! She is so proud of her bed and likes to get in it and get out of it and sit on it. She wanted to show Pete and all the kids and wouldn't take a nap yesterday because she was so excited. She still isn't talking much, but she has a smile that lights up the whole room. She will have her 2nd b-day next weekend and her birthmom is coming for her first visit! We all can't wait!

Lakin, my little snuggle boy is just the cutest little guy. He has started complaining about things and it is really cute. In baby talk he'll come up to me with his eye brows raised out of concern and tell me all about whatever he is concerned and mad about. It is so cute! He finally learned how to go down the stairs and he is so proud. The last few days, he'll just take off and go explore in the basement. I'll call down the stairs to him and he appears at the bottom of the stairs with different toys in hand and a big smile! man, I love that boy!

Here is a clip of one of his tantrums. He wanted the lunchbox that Preston had, but Preston had it first so we tried to convince him that the other one was cool. He was not happy about it. I finally went and got the camera, but I didn't get the real good parts of the fit... only one head stand. He ended up getting to have the lunch box he wanted when Preston was done with it. Tantrums are funny, but kind of sad when you just have to try to ignore the behavior!

Brothers

and best buddies! I love this pic.

Some News

There is a 6 week old baby boy in Indiana who needs a family. His darling parents want to make an adoption plan for him because they want him to have a better life. They want him to have more opportunities. They want him to have the things that he needs. They love him that much.

Our profile is in the group that they will look at today! Please pray for this couple, that they will find the family that they want for their son, and if, it is His will, they pick us!

**Update: They didn't pick us, or anyone. They have decided to parent the baby. They can't go through with making an adoption plan, which I can totally understand. I just hope that baby doesn't end up in foster care. Pray for them... they are teenagers and have NO support.

Disneyland '09

We took a spontaneous trip to Disneyland last week and had so much fun!

Disneyland was fun! Preston cried on almost every ride. He is still little even though he is big, but I wasn't expecting him to be so afraid of everything. He liked "It's a small world" so we went on that a few times for him. It's a cute ride and so happy. Caden loved that one too and Lakin was the cutest baby ever on that ride! He was so happy and waving his hands with the music... he loved it!


Pete and I love "Pirates of the Caribbean" the whole family can go on it together and with the couple of drops, it's fun. Lakin and Mylie were so interested in it all and they loved the fake animals.



Eating at Disneyland is so expensive! One day I bought six hot dogs and a soft pretzel and it cost over $50!

Alert!! Never go on the "Canoe ride" You think it's a ride because isn't everything at Disneyland? But really you basically have to paddle your way around the whole island. It was the worst! The kids kept looking at me as we struggled to use the paddles. Preston kept spraying the lady in front of us and Savanah was furious at the guide. She kept telling Savanah "sweetie, you aren't doing it right" or "keep paddling, no one gets to rest" I just laughed but was as annoyed as the kids! After that "ride" my arm hurt because I was one of the adults and expected to paddle the best and it was just not cool. Funny thinking about it though.

Lakin loved the balloons!

During day 2 my flip flop broke, so I hobbled into a souvenir shop and bought a new pair. Not really my favorite shoes, but the kids thought they were cool!
On our last night there, the kids lined up on main st. and then would run while I took action pics. We also sat outside the park for a little bit and let the kids run around and dance to the music. It was a fun trip! Here are some pics...

CC

My awesome sister Denae got her foster baby back! I am so happy for them and look how happy CC is! I just love this pic!

Closure

I am finally ready to write and post this post. A lot has gone on the last few weeks, but the good news is that the sibling group is living together again. All three of them are together! It's been over 2 years since they have lived together as brothers and sister. They are with a nice couple who hopes to adopt them! I am really happy for the couple and I think the kids will get lots of love and attention there. It is kind of interesting that the husband is Asian and the wife, a white girl. They met the kids months ago and the kids remembered who they were too. They told the caseworker..."oh the people who look like Angie and Pete?"

I really hope that everything will work out. The caseworker says that they are happy there. I still miss them, but we are hoping that we will be able to keep in touch with them a little over the years.

One thing I was happy about was that I got to send them all their bedroom stuff. I bought it for them anyway and it was for them. Why would I want a bunch of Kansas City Chiefs stuff? Or, the ugly Dora bedspread with the big face. The kids were so excited about their rooms and now they get to have all of their stuff in their new rooms. I boxed it all up and sent it. Some Spongebob stuff too, for the youngest. It helped to mail it to them.

Now, I need to paint over the oldest boys name. I think I will have Pete do it. I really love Dereyon and he really opened up to me, and I really wanted him to be my son. It's funny because he was the one that we were the most worried about with the adoption transition and the future etc. but he has my heart.

Here is a picture of my "old kids". I will always love them. This is when I took them to the circus in Missouri.

Before



After

My Walker

T, this post is for you. i love you!

Not To Be

My heart is a little broken right now and I am taking a blogging break. I am fine and will be o.k. I am very confused. The sibling group adoption we have been so excited about, and felt so good about, is just not meant to be. We don't know why, and may never understand. I do have the faith and know that God has a different plan for these kids. I really thought that they were to be my children, but I guess not.

If you are a really good family and are interested in adding 3 GREAT kids to your family, please let me know. I have been to Missouri twice to spend the weekend with them and I really love these kids. They are so cute and such good, sweet, kids. I know they will richly bless whatever family that ends up adopting them.

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If you are a young person who is sexually mature, please don't be irresponsible.

THINK before you act.

If you don't want a baby right now in your life, and you are not capable of taking proper care of a child, then don't have sex.

If you have addiction problems and are still trying to "find" yourself, or are not through with the "partying" stage, then fine, but, don't have sex.

If you do end up pregnant, or are responsible for getting a girl pregnant, then MAN UP and do the right thing. Either grow up, step up, and provide a loving and suitable home for a baby, or make an adoption plan.

Why would anyone want to be responsible for an abortion? I wouldn't.

Please don't be selfish, wanting what you want, only to have the state take your children after they have been through and witnessed horrible things.

I am sick to death of child suffering. Why must children suffer because of bad choices made by others? Usually their own parents.

Drugs, guns, alcohol, porn, gangs, any kind of abuse and children don't mix.

Soccer 2009

Soccer is in full swing around here! 2 games a week and a practice for every kid. We are eating and breathing soccer all week! 4 different teams this year. The twins are on the same team, and it's their first year and they are loving it!

They are adorable and their little uniforms are huge! When Carsen's shirt comes untucked half way through the game, it goes down past his shorts! It looks like he is running around in a long shirt! Caden and Carsen were nervous at their first game, and Kameron snapped some great pictures of the boys holding hands and grabbing each others arms. They are the best of friends, but don't normally hold hands and stuff... it was sure cute and I guess it helped calm their nerves for the big game against the "green" team.

Oh! The dreaded "green" team. After the game I listened as the boys told me that one of the players on the other team told them..."you are going down" well, Carsen took that opportunity and threat and replied with..."well, you and your team is a loser!" My little Carsey... there is always something going on with my boy! I had a talk about sportsmanship with him. We talked about how the most important part of playing soccer, is to have fun! I told him if anyone on the other team is mean, to just ignore them, or come tell me. Telling the other team that they are "losers" isn't very nice.

Game two report... both boys scored their first goals and there were no name calling incidents! Here's a cool picture of Carsen and Pete that Kameron took. It's right after Carsen's cleat flew off for the second time and Pete helped him put it back on!

Kameron loves her team this year and she is having so much fun. Her coach has her play defender, but also left forward, which was the position I played way back when. She is really good and her games are fun to watch!

Skyler is having a fun year and scores a lot. He is fun to cheer on and boys are just plain more aggressive than girls so his games are a little more intense.

Savanah runs her little heart out! She too is a great player and when someone on their team scores, all the girls are thrilled! It is really cute! Savanah is fast.

The little kids like going to the games too. Mylie runs around during half time and Lakin tries to get to the game ball.

Famous Husband

My husband is famous! Check him out! Go Pete! It really is so funny to us. The kids love that their daddy is on the cover of a magazine, but especially Skyler who thinks the world of Pete. Here's the link to the article.
P.S. Pete, you are so cute and I'm so proud of you!

iPhone Pics

Here are some of my favorite iPhone pics that Pete has taken. Up until he got his iPhone, he never took any pics, so it's fun to see what he captures!








Lakin and his bio sister, Anilah!

The Race

I was supposed to run the Hobble Creek Half marathon with some family members, but I didn't. I started off doing great with my training, but I had a really bad July and never recovered in the "marathon" department. So, I might run it next year. It was a good thing I didn't run because I got to be a cheerleader and cheer everyone on! I got balloons and some snickers bars and took lots of pics. My sis-in-law Emily took my place and she ran great! She also dedicated the 13th mile to me! Thanks Ems and good running! Here are some pics of my brave and strong relatives running their guts out. I am very proud of my parents! My mom came in 3rd out of all the family that ran and my dad 5th and their times were great! Pete, Chad, Devin, Brett, Dustin, and Kays... next year is our year!

Kim, mom, Denae, dad, and Dave

Go Landon!

Emily (aka "Angie" during the race) and D-Dawg

The cheering crowd!

Dustin and Brett rode up the race route to cheer everyone on.

iPhone fun!

More Family Visit

One day, the men got up really early and went golfing... that meant us ladies had a girls day out! We went up to Park City and did the Alpine Slides! It was really fun. I liked the coaster the best and then the zip line. The zip line was really freaky while waiting in line, but after the doors open and you fall a little onto the zip and start speeding down the mountain, it was pretty and kind of peaceful! We girls had a blast and I love my mom and sisters! I'm constantly so thankful that my brothers have all married really great, wonderful girls! I love them all! It was a lot of fun!

Up the mountain, chair lift pics!



The Slide!




The Coaster! Going up.

The top.

Coming down!




The Zip Line. Denae checking her pulse because she was so scared!

Go mom!

Family Visit

My whole family was together this past weekend! We had a blast. The first day, we hung around with everyone and then went to Jump On It. A place that has tons of trampolines hooked together and it is a lot of fun. 2 years ago, I sprained my ankle really bad at that place so I didn't play this time and I am glad. Within the first 10 minutes of being there, 4 family members were already hurt! The little kids had so much fun! Here is a video of Mylie taking out Lakin and her little cousin Wyatt! Luckily the boys didn't mind!



Macey, Mylie, and Lexi!



There was an infestation of these spiders on the outside of the building. We were all freaking out because they are so big and sick. I don't mind bees, or other bugs, or really even mice, but spiders are just plain nasty. I wish you could see just how big this spider is... so sick.





iphone fun!

Morning Hike

Last week the 3 big kids and I got up at 5 a.m. and went with my good friend Jen and her 3 big kids and hiked up the trail to the Timpanogos Caves. It was a lot of fun! The hike was great exercise, but talking with Jen was the best part. I think we'll hike to the "Y" next time!

The boys... Devon, Skyler, and Calvin
The girls... Emily, Kameron, and Savanah


We made it to the top! Touching the lucky stone!

Savanah's B-day!

We celebrated Savanah's b-day early because she wanted to, and her birthday is right when school starts. I told her she could have a "friend" birthday this year, but she didn't want one. She just wanted a family party! Those are my favorite anyway. Out of all the places to go, she picked Chucky E. Cheese! I think Chuck E. Cheese is one big germ and family sickness waiting to happen... it's so gross! the kids love to get "tokens" and play the games and win "tickets" and then go pick a prize. They just love it! So, that's where we went and I was giving them sanitizer to rub in their little hands every chance I could!

I made Savanah go stand by Chuck E. himself for this pic! What does the mystery E. stand for anyway?




(Mylie and daddy are missing in this pic... they were ordering the pizza)

She had a blast and had never won so many tickets there before! All the kids loved the prizes they got and after we ate pizza and were done playing games, we went home and she opened presents and we ate the ice cream pie she wanted instead of birthday cake. I can't believe my short little Filipina is 9 years old! Here's a pic of my baby Banna. She was such a chubby, cute little Asian.



I love you so much my Savanah!!